Why You Shouldn’t Pay Off Your Debt (Entirely)
- Category: Blog
Last week I re-connected with my niece with whom I haven’t spoken with for 20 years.
It’s a long story.
It is amazing to re-establish a relationship with someone who was such a big piece of my life when we were both younger.
Her life took some bizarre turns, and my life really came together to bring me closer to my authentic self, a place of healing she has yet to experience.
It is a gift to both of us. She now gets a chance to make different choices that she never knew existed nor had the option to exercise.
What prevented her from feeling whole?
What messages did she glean from her early years, that ended up in a two year prison sentence as an adult?
We are on the crest of the start of summer.
Six months ago many people made resolutions to make their lives better in the coming 12 months. Some promised to lose weight, save money, spend more time with their kids, work fewer hours but, in general, the source was the same: the desire for change.
So, for all of you who made such declarations, I am asking for accountability: How is it going?
I took a small poll…10 people who I knew made such a promise in January. 8 of them pretty much said the same thing: “ I was really good for a few months, but things came up that threw me off my path…”
Keeping our personal commitments is very challenging, especially when we are not clear with ourselves; What are we doing, what are we thinking or feeling?
Is what is in front of us going to be good for us, or put us in peril?
Are we about to do something that will cause us to lose our self-respect or increase our trust in ourselves?
Do you get the Sunday afternoon blues? Do you start thinking about the next day with a sinking feeling? Do you rationalize that what you do for a living enables you to have a certain lifestyle? Do you wish for a change but are lost as to what would make you happy and fulfilled? Take heart: 70 percent of Americans feel detached from their jobs.
What stands in the way of getting what you want?
Do you sabotage your performance at work, or do you sabotage your chances of being happy, because you are afraid of declaring your real feelings?
Are you playing it safe, hiding in a dead-end job because you are afraid of getting too much attention and you want to stay below the radar? Does getting pushed out of your comfort zone make you freeze?
Do you meet women who seem confident, assured, and at ease and wish you could feel the same?
It has become commonplace in our society today, that the word ‘addiction’ is used as often as Gazunheit.
And, it has become almost a condoned behavior, that when people march off to re-hab, we accept it as if our child is going to graduate school, again; the natural consequence of some scholarly study, in spite of the fact that our child has become the perennial student; always in school, never having an office to go to.
But addiction, by the definition of repetitive behaviors, much like Freud’s Repetitive Compulsion concept, will show up constantly in our everyday lives if we step back and gain some perspective on our actions.