Here are some great tips from one of my former clients, Kristan! Are you dreaming of a debt free Christmas? I have to admit that there was a time in my life when the idea of even contemplating controlling my spending at the holidays would have thrown me into a full blown panic attack. I …
The holidays always stir up memories, and with them, feelings of guilt and expectations, especially when it comes to gift-giving. Somewhere along the line, how much we give or receive has become the measurement of love and appreciation: “The more expensive the gift, the more you love me.” At least that’s what I came to …
Are you a high earner, but still living paycheck to paycheck? Do people call you an overachiever, always pushing boundaries to get one more thing done? Can falling asleep sometimes feel like a war zone of worry, causing you to question your decisions from the day? Is the voice in your head relentless with criticism …
A few weeks ago, I took a call from a woman who was concerned that her bankruptcy would turn off any man she dated, thus creating a “no-fly zone” in her chances of remarrying. Her second marriage had lasted 11 years and she ran a successful company during that time. Since she bore much of …
I was last born into a family of five. With an older sister, older brother, and my parents, I had four times as many chances to be valued and celebrated, but at times I had equally as many chances to be pushed away and marginalized. The problem? Everyone, from a newborn baby to an adult, …
The drive to perfection is learned very early in one’s childhood as a misconception that if we are “perfect” we will be loved. But in fact, perfection is a shame based drive. It removes one from the moment, reduces playfulness and feeling free. It has no limits. The drive goes into infinity, floating without boundaries, …
Bonding is the term used to describe the dynamic of merging underlying needs to behaviors, which will then be the driving force behind every decision one makes for their entire life. That need will become disguised, re-shaped, re-directed as we gain tools, knowledge, and power. The child will pass out of the bonding stage as …
Bonding Is the Driving Force Behind All Decisions Read More »
Several years ago we had a program where people could write their questions and we would provide answers. We found this little gem and wanted to share a common issue in families. Question: I have two young children and I grew up in a household where secrets and holding things back was frowned upon. The …
Can You Give Your Kids Too Much Information About Money? Read More »
What you avoid will control your relationship. As women, shame comes in our starter kit. The perception that we, as authentically born, are not “good enough”. Our worthiness is like a sieve; we hold those moments of pride fleetingly. We smile and nod with seeming to agree acknowledgments. We feel disconnected to the applause, accolades, …
Shame can be the portal to intimacy in your relationship Read More »
It’s no secret that people spend more time planning their vacations than they do their retirement. Vacations and Christmas battle for which one gets the most attention, but at least vacations don’t dredge up guilt about gifts for the uncle you’ve never liked or how much to spend on your new beau when you’ve only …